witnessed_and_held

Welcome!

Hello and welcome!  I am so grateful and jazzed that you have taken a breath and joined me for a time.  This is purely and simply an act of love,
gradually manifested over the last 12 years, as I sat in Sacred Circles. That's were I fell in love with my spirit and found my Inner Queen.  Self love may not be that rare, and I'm sure it would not have happened for me, if it hadn't been for the way I was witnessed and held year after year, by beautiful women and men from around the world.

Majestic Light

Almost a year of visioning and designing came together with joy, ease and a deep sense of knowing, with the first session of Majestic Light.  Nine women of color (nine is the number of completion), representing four decades of age, diversity of profession, backgrounds and ways of being; entered into the sacred space that had been created. 

The theme "living a healthy and congruent life at the core of our being - body, spirit, emotions, mind" seemed natural, for these are stressful times we live in, but they don't have to be. I looked at my close friend and Circle partner and smiled, as the sound of the first doorbell rang. We were ready!

With a backdrop of organic and natural, slowing down, and taking the time to be present with whatever showed up, we began with a healthy breakfast and then prepared to enter ritual space.  You could hear the soft buzz of souls unfamiliar with each other begin to slowly waltz together, ever so gently with curiosity and hope, as we would be together for a year of Personal Development & Coaching.  Each woman came forth, looked deep within her own eyes, and said "YES" to this precious time that she had claimed as her own.

CELEBRATING OUR INNER QUEEN - BRAZIL

It's been a while and I've been so blessed to sit in over a dozen Circles since my last sharing.  Life has just continued all around me and I have risen every morning in gratitude for the beautiful hearts that surround me on this path of life.  What about you?

And in less than one day, seven of us will travel to the annual gathering of Queen.  We are a diverse group professionally; a lawyer, marketing specialist, high school counselor, government manager, psychologist, retired affirmative action officer and me.  And we have one thing in common, we are women of African descent.  Each year I wait for spirit to speak to me about our next location, and when Salvador, Bahia showed up in my consciousness, a deep YES rose up and bellowed from my mouth.

Queen is a time when we appreciate all the external things that we have experienced or received, and even more, it is a time to appreciate who we are from the inside out.  It is a time of introspection, noticing, nourishment, relaxation, deep breath, laughter and being present for each other, that is extraordinary.  It is extraordinary because, we have nothing between us pulling us from the day to day doing.  What we do have is each other and the being with, listening and reflecting together in one shared community.

I am especially excited because this is my first trip to Brazil.  Having traveled to almost every continent, I have never been to this part of the world.  And I've learned that this is the place where millions of slaves were deported over 300 years ago.  And, over the years they have influenced the culture in such a way that our African heritage is alive and present through the music, dance, brilliant colors, food and the spirit of this land.  It is said that the welcome that one receives, penetrates our very soul!  So, we are ready to receive! 

One of the highlights will be a day visit with the Sisters of the Good Death, which is a 285 year old circle of wise women.  And so yes, we will be in CIRCLE anointed and blessed by the presence of each other up close and personal.  We will celebrate our majesty through daily ritual that replenishes and leaves us refreshed.

Some of our journey is planned because that's how we do retreats, and so much of it is waiting for us, welcoming us to just be present.  And this is what I most wish for every one of us - for you; that we be present every moment to this wonderful life that is ours to experience one breath at a time.

The Seven Queens will embrace each other with grace and beauty and return on July 1, remembering what it feels like to truly walk this path sensing who we are from the inside out.  We will return with a certain knowing that true beauty comes when we SLOW down and care for self and each other.  True beauty comes when we touch into the invisible and rekindle the flame that is ours, when we are  witnessed and held with loving-kindness and compassion in the arms of beautiful women.

Gratitude - Like Minded People

I've always had an appreciation and yearning to be with people that were able to see in between the lines. People that could sense the gray, trusting their instinct - knowing that there was something more than what they could SEE or the promise of, "if you do this, you'll get that."  I guess it's just that I'm finding that I have a preference to be with people who desire to seek and deepen into being more  conscious.  People who get that we're all interconnected with everything, and that we are energy with a particular heartbeat that resonates with the universe.

Sometimes, I find myself in the mixed company of people who speak with anger, resentment, disappointment and bitterness in their tone.  I feel sadness at these times, knowing that the energy emitted from this tone permeates all that are present and flows right out onto the street.  I want to turn and flee, afraid that the residue will spill onto my way of being.  But then I stop and close my eyes, trusting that my feelings of love, compassion and kindness can meet the forces of bitterness and sadness.  And it got me to thinking, what if I could do this everytime, what if I could emit this loving kindness every time, I faced this wounded, hurting energy.  And then I started thinking about how much of this do I encounter every week, every day!

Sometimes - a lot.  And it all depends on where I find myself from moment to moment, where I choose to show up.

This is one of the many reasons why I have chosen to show up in so many circles.  I love to be held in a Circle space.  As I enter my twelve year in circle space, I can count on one hand the number of times I've felt this kind of negative bitterness from an individual and/or from the collective.  I've come to trust that the women and men that come to circle, come because they sense the sacred space deep within the well of their being. They know that so much will not have to be explained, because their is a belief system built around values of what it means to be a human being at this time of our existence. That it matters what we emit to another.

It's not that we all agree on everything while in circle, sometimes we don't.  And we know that we can come with our hopes, dreams, experiences, expressions - ready to listen, ready to be influenced.  In the end we may agree to disagree, but its with a certain sense of well being that is quite noticeable.  There is no anger, no fear, no resentment, no competition, or bitterness.  Just a place for "like minded people" to come and be present with each other.  It just feels good and I believe that we need more places in our lives to nourish feeling good about ourself and each other.

Do you have this kind of place in your life? 

No Coincidence!

Do you believe in mistakes?

Some people believe that the blunders and bloopers; the good and not so good; the ups and downs of life, are all part of the cosmic spiritual roller coaster called life.  Or as some have recently stated,  that we "attract" everything into our life.

Last week you mistakenly received some writing that I've started to work on.  It's a story about a preacher's kid, and yes I happen to also be a preacher's kid.  But the story is not me and I am not her, even though we have a lot of shared experiences, perhaps like you and I.

I have come to trust that whatever happens in my life, is probably not a coincident, even though sometimes there has been unhappiness, unconsciousness or deep regret.  However, there have actually been way more good times and joy throughout my life.  And isn't it interesting how we remember the things that hurt us, way more than the things that bring us happiness.

Anyway, I now know and believe that she wanted all of you to know that her story is being written, that I am birthing her into the universe.  This is the only explanation that I've got for hitting the wrong key last week.  And now, I too understand. 

To my friend who brought this to my attention as she asked, "did you intend to publish that writing."
NOOOO, I shrieked. Thank you.  And to all of you out there in the "field" some I don't even know, witnessing and holding ME, I am grateful!

P.S. She doesn't have a name yet, any ideas?

Living Life with Health as Core

For the last four years, I have been held in a very different kind of circle space... one that has left my body, mind, spirit and emotions clearer each time.

In this circle the day begins and ends with the same routine.  I rise early; drink about 16 ozs. of water, then move into my personal morning meditation and journaling.  Afterward, I walk to the juice room, find a machine and juice about 6 ozs.  of wheat grass, which I drink immediately.  You won't find lemon chasers here! I leisurely return to my room, but not for too long, as I prepare to arrive for morning exercises by 7:25 a.m. to get a good spot. 

The whole community of 150 come together, some inside and others outside for movement, particularly created to eliminate toxins from the body.  For the next hour, I breathe deeply taking very slow deliberate inhales and exhales; move my upper body; take a brisk walk of 1 mile; and then return to move my lower body.  Many of the exercises are familiar like rotating my arms in large circles, flexing my wrist, sit ups, doing the HULA and bicycling.  But others are new and different like the HA!  Even though after 4 years, they all seem normal, that HA always gets me.   

At the end of the class, the staff calls out "Circle Time" and everyone from the outside comes inside where we form a huge circle, taking up every space in the room.  We receive a glance of the days activities and then we move into a period of being connected with Self and each other.  My right hand is held about 4 inches from the left hand of the person next to me faced down, and my left hand is held about 4 inches from the right hand of the person on my left, faced up.  Have you ever tried this?  You can actually feel the energy of both persons, interwoven with your own and it's wonderful!  In this gesture of connection, we listen to a random selection from a book called, "When God Spoke" by Eileen Caddy.  At the conclusion of the reading, we hug ourself, and then the person on our left and right sides. You can just feel the energy and warm enthusiasm, as we begin to move to the area of receiving our morning meal....yum!

HOW'S YOUR BREATHING???

Celebrating Our Inner Queen

4th ANNUAL "CELEBRATING OUR INNER QUEEN"
Bahia, Brazil    June 22-29, 2007
(Circle space for Women of African Descent -
personal exploration, sacred seclusion,
awakening to possibilities)

The Call:
We long for a deeper sense of knowing and tapping into our heritage as women of the Mother land by celebrating and rejoicing in our beauty.  We tune into the vibrations of all that holds us - the earth, air, water, stars and moon.  We awaken to each sunrise, communing with spirit and the powers of our inner Queen.  We come in recognition and honor of our sisterhood, in celebration of this rite of passage that is ours to claim, rich in recognition of what has brought us to this moment in time.

The Journey:
We land in a country with terrain that is unfamiliar.  The climate is just right and in the distance, we feel the combination of the fresh breeze mixed with the aroma of the native culture.  We exhale, remembering the freedom that comes by living life like its golden.  What lies ahead is an extraordinary adventure.  The language, faces, colors, textures, taste, and sensations are ours to take in and we are excited, filled with what is to come!

The Process:
We sit in a Sacred Circle with women that look like us.  Women of various hues of olive, beige, brown and black.  Women of diverse professions, shapes, ages, geographies and ways of being.  We speak one at a time, mold and shape our time together.  We bring questions from the darkness, and make them visible for all to explore.  We open to spirit, sit in our tensions and flow more easily with what emerges.

The Time:
Our time is filled with sharing stories, conscious breathe, meditation, attuning our energy, affirmations, improvisation, moving our bodies, cultural expeditions, dancing, singing, laughing, playing, and massaging our bodies.  Our time is both structured and loose, planned and spontaneous, exuberant and still, serious and hilarious!

You're invited now to take a couple of deep breaths...